Plague of Ducks

Let me tell you about my awesome weekend.

Thursday evening I flew to Vegas with my friend, Val. Arrakis, Johnny, and Cheng met us at the airport and we all crammed into Johnny's little car and went to check into our hotel by way of In-n-Out burger. We stayed at Circus Circus. But not in the main building. We had a room in the Manor buildings out on the back side of the property. The room was (in theory) non-smoking, but it smelled like stale cigarettes anyway. By the end of the weekend, it also smelled like five twenty-somethings who spent the whole weekend walking around Vegas drunk. In other words, it smelled like Death.

After we dropped all our stuff in the room and had a few drinks, we headed out into the night. We walked up the strip from our room to.... well, we walked a lot. I think we finally turned around at The Flamingo. Occasionally, we'd go into some casino or other and play some penny slots. On the way back to Circus Circus (hereafter known as CC, because I'm too lazy to type the whole word), I found a mannequin leaning up against a rock. It was obviously stolen from somewhere and then abandoned. Naturally, I rescued it from it's fate of abandonment and probable dumpsterhood. I think the most entertaining part of the evening for us (and many a passerby) was me carrying a naked mannequin down the street. Her name is Janene and she lives with Cheng now.

Friday morning I was the first to wake up (at 11:30) and take a shower. By the time everyone else was up and ready to go, it was probably 1 or 2 in the afternoon. Val had to write a paper so she went off to the business center and the rest us went off to Slots-A-Fun across the street for 1/2 lb, 99¢ hot dogs for lunch (don't worry, we brought one back for Val. We wouldn't let her starve). They were huge. They were disgusting. They were not for the weak of stomach. They were awesome.

After lunch, we wandered around CC wile we waited for Val to finish her paper. Eventually we landed on the bleachers for the free circus show that they put on. We saw two good acts and one really silly one. The first act was a clown who did some Chaplin-esque hat tricks and then some amazing tricks with a Diablo. Following the clown was an act with three acrobats. Their main gimmick involved the guy balancing a big post on his head or shoulder and then one of the women would climb up the pole and do some crazy balancing thing. It was much more exciting than it sounds. The fine feat for this trio was incredible; One chick climbed to the top of a pole, attached herself to it by her hair and then spun around really really fast like a helicopter blade. It made my head hurt just looking at it. The last act was some guy with a pony tail who spun a net and held on to a couple ropes while he flew around the stage. Very anti-climatic after super-hair-girl.

When Val finally finished her paper, we set off for Fremont Street for some gigantic drinks and cheap gambling. I think the drinks are called yard-long margaritas, or something, but only Arrakis actually had a margarita in her giant glass. I had an orange thing that was made with a lot everclear. Needless to say, I was pretty wasted by the time I finished about half of it (we started drinking in the room before hand so this was strong fruity drink on top of a pleasant vanilla-vodka-coke buzz). For dinner we had the buffet at the Plaza. I hear it was rather tasty. I was so full (and drunk) from my three foot high orange thing that all I could manage to eat was a cheeseburger. It was a waste of a perfectly good smorgasbord of food stuffs. We spent the night wandering around playing slots and collecting mardigras beads from scantily clad women in feathered headdresses. I won ten dollars in nickels at one point. None of us were able to finish our giant drinks. We all stumbled back to the room and passed out around 2 am.

Saturday we got a little bit earlier start. We had lunch at Makino- a sushi buffet; all you can eat for $15. It was actually really good, but I'm not sure I could handle eating that much food ever again. After lunch we took the bus down to the far end of the strip to do all the touristy stuff. We went to M&M world. We tried 12 different kinds of Coke from around the world at the Coca-Cola store. Cheng, Val and I rode the roller coaster at New York New York (It was really fun, but not worth $14 dollars). We got Eiffel Tower shaped drinks at The Paris. We watched the fountains at The Belagio. We went in the Belagio to see the Chihuly ceiling and the gardens. Then we made our way over to Ceasar's Palace for some more gambling and drinks before the best part of the entire trip (for me anyway).

At 10:00 we saw Eddie Izzard!!!!!! He was there as part of the Comedy Festival that was going all weekend. I can't even tell you how much I love this man! He is hilarious beyond all reason. If you have never heard of him, go forth and seek him out. There are some very entertaining snippets on YouTube from some of his DVDs. Seriously though, by the end of his act my face hurt from laughing. But wait it gets better! Later while we were hanging out in the casino, he walked right by us!

I MET EDDIE FUCKING IZZARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The tragic thing is my camera battery died back at the Belagio. I did get a picture with him (yes! me and Eddie Izzard) on my phone, but it is a crappy picture. He was also wasted beyond all reason and told me he was going to pass out. Also shorter than I expected. Maybe that's why he's so into wearing heels. But the point is I met him. He put his arm around me (for the picture)! I was so excited I nearly cried. If I had died right then, heaven (like I would get in) would have paled in comparison.

Do I even have to talk about the rest of the trip? Fine.

After MEETING EDDIE IZZARD (*ahem* sorry), we met up with Troy and one of his co-workers (Joy) who flew in from AZ while we were at the show. The 7 of us frittered the night away at Caesar's Palace and Treasure Island (TI, if you're cool). We all sort of wandered back to the hotel in shifts. Val and I left Troy and Joy at the roulette table around 3 am and walked back to CC. On the way we met two charming chaps from England. They were difficult to understand but fun to talk to. Nothing particularly exciting happened with that, but it was a pleasant way to end a super fantastic night.

Sunday we woke up much earlier than any of us wanted to, packed up and checked out. We met Troy and Joy for breakfast at the CC Cafe (really not very good, but convenient) then headed out of town by way of a porn store (why not?). I have to say that the ride back was not very comfortable. Johnny drives a sion, which is a very nice car, but not at all comfortable when you have to share it with four other people and a mannequin. I'm a bit stiff and sore from the ride.

We got back to SLC around 11. I'm tired as anything today and not too thrilled to be at work. Still, it was a great trip. I can find nothing to complain about.


As a side note, the bookstore called on Friday. They just left a message to call back, which I will do today. Perhaps I gave up on that job a bit too early.
Update 3:45: The bookstore offered me a part time job at $1.50 less an hour than I'm making now. I had to turn it down- I can't really afford to do that. I guess I could stay full time here, or drop down to 3/4 time, but I barely have time to get everything done and have a life as it is. Oh no! Now I'm thinking about it, I'm regretting turning it down. I've just remembered that I hate my job and working at a bookstore would be really fun. Crap!