I've added something else to my list of why my job sucks (I didn't quit yet, by the way, though I sometimes have to wonder why). It inspires non-confidence. Today I had the very arduous task of updating the company phone directory because a bunch of the guys downstairs moved their offices and have new extensions. It's not a hard thing to do, really. I just, you know, talked to the guys downstairs and e-mailed an updated phone list to everyone. A few hours after I sent out the e-mail one of the structural engineers called me:
Are you sure [name deleted] is still at 216?
He's still at 216?
So they moved the number over there? ([name deleted] moved his office, and his extension moved with him])
So they have two phones over there now?
Are you sure?
No, even though I asked both [name deleted] and [other name deleted] about the extensions. You're probably right, it's probably wrong. In fact, I just made up a bunch of numbers for the whole phone list just to fuck with you. Why would I do this? Well, I'm either incredibly stupid or I'm making an artistic statement. But I don't really know. Maybe you should ask El Douche. He will be able to assure you of my inability to accomplish even the simplest of tasks.*
Did I mention that this engineer happens to be El Douche's boss? He's a nice enough guy, but I'm pretty sure that entire department has discussed my every (over-exaggerated) flaw. Thankfully, I think E.D. has mostly kept his opinions mostly to himself, but it's impossible for him to keep quiet about everything.
I get talked down to by a lot of people here actually. I don't know if it has anything to do with El Douche. Probably has more to do with my comply apathy toward the job and my lackluster effort to do anything. I also don't know how much of my unethusiasm is brought on by people treating me like I can't do anything well.
I'm inspired to live up to the expectation that I am completely incompetent. And I'm wondering if I am, perhaps, a little paranoid.
*not what I actually said, obviously. But, my god, it was tempting to respond with something snarky and sarcastic.